Elijah Wood vs. Topher Grace
Battle of the Saucer-Eyed Striplings

Way back in 1993, a movie called The Good Son hit theatres. It was notable at the time because child-acting phenom Macauley Culkin starred as an amoral Bad Seed-esque hellion, running counter to the image he'd fostered -- as a precocious, rosy-cheeked Everyboy -- in movies like My Girl, Uncle Buck, and the first two Home Alone movies. At least, that was the big story before the movie was released. After critics saw it, folks were more interested in Elijah Wood, Culkin's playmate in the movie, and the fact that he blew Culkin clean off the screen.

In the seven years since then, Macauley Culkin has proven himself to be so much crappy-movie-making, child-bride-taking, career-away-pissing, personality-becoming flotsam, and Elijah Wood has, through a series of canny film choices, managed to make a relatively seamless transition from child star to teen star to...well, whatever the fuck he's supposed to be in the Lord of the Rings movies. Sure, The Faculty didn't exactly set the cinematic world on fire, but working with Kevin Williamson at that stage in both men's trajectories was a smart move on Wood's part.

Look. We like Elijah Wood. The Ice Storm is one of our favourite movies, and he's phenomenal in it -- understated, heartbreaking, even cute in his '70s fashions. The thing is -- how to put this delicately? -- he's just not as cute as he used to be. Remember when he used to look a bit like an embryonic Chris O'Donnell? Yeah. Now? Not so much. And we're not saying that it diminishes his talent as an actor or that he shouldn't work because of it, but Hollywood is not known for rewarding talent over looks.

Plus, Topher Grace exists.

To this commentator, Topher Grace looks the way we thought Elijah Wood would look when he was twenty -- cute. Is Topher Grace the actor Elijah Wood is? No. Does he have the variety of film credits under his belt that Elijah Wood has? Not hardly. Is he cuter -- is he, in fact, a lot cuter? Yes. Yes, he is. Much cuter. And here's the thing. Every week, we see geeky-cute Topher Grace macking with über-babe Laura Prepon, and this month we see him as a geeky-cute Honours student who teaches a classmate how to free-base cocaine in Traffic. And what'll Elijah Wood be doing the next time we see him? Working hairy prosthetic feet as Frodo Baggins -- all "geeky," no "cute." That'll mark his transition from bankable leading (young) man to bug-eyed character actor (which, frankly, hasn't worked out all that badly for William Fichtner).

Advantage: Topher Grace, because he's just going to keep on getting cuter.