To be honest, this summer looks, at first glance, surprisingly, well, essential. Entertaining, even. Y'all know you'll be out at Batman Begins on the opening weekend. And that War of the Worlds trailer looks pretty tasty.

But it wouldn't be summer without a hot slew of entirely skippable, completely wrong-headed, and essentially inessential films. And they're out there. This year, you just have to look a little harder.

Which we did. And we found them. Here, once again, Fametracker runs down the who, what, when, and why-not of the ten most missable films of the season.

10. The Skeleton Key

Release Date: August 12
The Plot: Kate Hudson's scared, because something scary's going on, and it seems to involve this key.
The Pitch: "Naomi Watts, Nicole Kidman, and even Sarah Michelle Gellar all got to star in money-making horror films called The [Something]! I want one too! Mom!"
Why It's Inessential: We guess if you're willing to trudge out to each Grudge, Ring, and Others-Come-Lately, maybe you'll enjoy this. But when does it stop? Next summer you'll be going to see Brittany Murphy in The Plug...then Hilary Duff in The Frame...then Lacey Chabert in The Spooky Vase. Seriously, wean yourself off the crap teat now.

9. Stealth

Release Date: July 29
The Plot: Josh Lucas, Jessica Biel, and a pre-superfame Jamie Foxx play reckless, rascally pilots racing to stop a rogue robot fighter jet. Let's go!
The Pitch: It's Top Gun meets XXX. Then they decide to go for lunch, and on the way they run into The Fast and the Furious, so they invite it to join them, then they all wave at The Last Starfighter, who's passing by with Blue Thunder.
Why It's Inessential: Because it's the requisite mid-budget action movie that comes out every summer and invariably kind of exceeds expectations but, in hindsight, really wasn't that memorable. You know, like Reign of Fire meets U-571.

8. Sky High

Release Date: July 29
The Plot: Kurt Russell and Kelly Preston play superheroes whose son is attending a high school for superheroes.
The Pitch: Just like The Incredibles, but more live-action-y.
Why It's Inessential: We guess it's hard, once you've spent a lot of money and time and many years on making a film, to shelve it when someone the year before makes a better version of the same film that's really entertaining and a huge hit and is a cartoon. But somewhere there's a shelf and this film should be on it.

7. Monster-In-Law

Release Date: May 13
The Plot: It's Meet the Parents, except with Jane Fonda and Jennifer Lopez instead of Robert De Niro and Ben Stiller. In other words, pretty much a wash.
The Pitch: "How come De Niro and Hoffman and goddamn Barbra Streisand all got to star in a money-making familial-strife comedy! I want one too! Dad!"
Why It's Inessential: Why is J.Lo?

6. Herbie: Fully Loaded

Release Date: June 24
The Plot: Hilton-esque train wreck Lindsay Lohan tries to remind us why we liked her last summer in Mean Girls. Her vehicle: a sentient car. Get it? Vehicle?
The Pitch: Beep beep! Someone's got big boobs!
Why It's Inessential: As far as entirely pointless, idiotic remakes go, this one gets a slight nod over The Honeymooners only because of the entirely satisfying "Lohan -- Fully Loaded" jokes that are sure to become a staple of the summer.

5.5 The Honeymooners

Release Date: June 10
The Plot: Cedric the Entertainer plays the Jackie Gleason role in a film that strives to bring the classic sitcom to a whole new generation of people who totally don't remember this show at all.
The Pitch: "I will punch you so hard, my wife, that you will fly into space and land on the moon. I swear I will. Also, my blue-collar job makes me cranky."
Why It's Inessential: "Hey, let's do a remake of The Honeymooners except with black people, because we all know how near and dear that show was to the black community."

5. Mindhunters

Release Date: May 6
The Plot: Originally filmed in 1973, Mindhunters stars Val Kilmer and LL Cool J as FBI agents who hunt minds. Or hunt someone in their minds. Or in someone else's mind. One thing's for sure: They're hunting minds! (Or hunting in minds!)
The Pitch: From Renny Harlin, the director who brought you no movie you ever liked ever.
Why It's Inessential: Why is Renny Harlin?

4. Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo

Release Date: August 12
The Plot: Rob Schneider is back as classic comic creation Deuce Bigalow -- and he's funnier than ever. Which is to say, funny.*
*may not actually be funny
The Pitch: If you liked Deuce Bigalow, Male Gigolo, then you are probably brain-damaged. Please step out of the forklift.
Why It's Inessential: Yes, we're also surprised that this isn't number one, but come on -- it's just too easy. Someday, historians will look back at the successful film career of Rob Schneider and take it as conclusive proof that there was something terribly wrong with our drinking water.

3. Fantastic Four

Release Date: July 8
The Plot: He's stretchy! She's invisible! He can set himself on fire! He's made of rocks!
The Pitch: It's the superhero movie even comic geeks didn't really care to see!
Why It's Inessential: Uh, because they made a totally awesome Fantastic Four movie already, back in 1994?!? Hello!?! Plus, when they did a Fantastic Four cartoon back in the '80s, a kid in Australia set himself on fire so they had to take out the Human Torch and replace him with a robot called Robbie the Robot, who SUCKED. Then a kid in Australia tried to change himself into a robot. And that kid grew up to be Guy Pearce. True story.

2. The Dukes of Hazzard

Release Date: August 5
The Plot: Just some good ol' boys! Never do no harm!
The Pitch: Jessica Simpson has an ass. Would you like to see it?
Why It's Inessential: Obviously, the whole point of this movie is to see Jessica Simpson in tiny, tiny denim hot pants. This is all anyone has talked about in relation to this film. Then we see a photo from the film and she's wearing full-length jeans? Uh, what? If she's not wearing tiny, tiny denim hot pants for nearly every frame of this movie, then everyone in Hollywood is fired. We mean it.
Bonus Inessentiality: You know, we're all for tongue-in-cheek, chortle-chortle irony, but is there any universe in which you can imagine this film being anything other than ninety minutes of shrill, moronic nonsense? We even liked the first Charlie's Angels, but can we stop the insanity, please? Hollywood? Are you listening? Are your fancy cars so important to you? We should pass a law that people who finance films like this may keep all the money, but when they die, they will be interred in a mausoleum at which this film will be shown on a big video screen, on a loop.

1. The Pink Panther

Release Date: August 5
The Plot: Steve Martin revives the classic comic character of Inspector Clouseau.
The Pitch: "Sure, Peter Sellers was okay -- but personally, I thought his performance was a little too heavy on the genius."
Why It's Inessential: Because in a summer of pointless retreads, this one's the most pointless and most retread-y. Because at least the other remakes seem simply crass -- cashing in on some vague name recognition -- while this one is all that with a side order of movie-star vanity. Because it's hard to conceive of anything more inessential, in the truest sense, than a remake of a Peter Sellers film. Because what's next? Adam Sandler in a remake of Dr. Strangelove? Jimmy Fallon in The Party? Owen Wilson and Vince Vaughn in Some Like It Hotter?