· Image Search

Five stories about Victor Wong:

1. When Frank Oz and George Lucas were having meetings, circa 1978 or so, sketching sketches and shuffling through design prototypes and generally trying to puzzle out what Yoda, the Jedi Master, should look like, and how he should move, and what his personality should be, if the name "Victor Wong" didn't come up, or if a picture of Victor Wong wasn't pulled out of a briefcase with a great "ta-da!", or if Lucas didn't at least say "Remember the wizened old Chinese guy from Big Trouble in Little China? Like that guy"--well, I'll eat my hat with plum sauce. Except, of course, BTinLC was released in 1986. So forget I said anything.
2. If you are making a Hollywood movie about Chinese people, like, say, Year of the Dragon, or The Golden Child, or Shanghai Surprise, or The Joy Luck Club, then you are contractually obligated by the governing laws of Hollywood to include Victor Wong in that movie, unless you can prove that nowhere in the script is there any call for a wise, old, wizened, slightly-crazed, slightly ominous, fortune-telling Chinese guru. In which case, you are probably not making a Hollywood movie about Chinese people in the first place.
3. We've all heard stories about how, of the 6 million screenplays that are written every year, only 40,000 are optioned, and only 8000 of those begin production, and only 1800 make it to the theatres. Or something like that. Anyway, the point is to demonstrate the Darwinian winnowing-out that occurs as projects flow down the great Hollwyood film pipeline. But did you know that in 1990 there was released a film entitled Life Is Cheap... But Toilet Paper is Expensive? Victor Wong does, because he was in it. What part did he play? We don't know. But we're willing to guess it was a wise, old, wizened, slightly-crazed, slightly ominous, fortune-telling Chinese guru. Or maybe a sky-diver.
4. Does your resumé include the following roles: Uncle Tam, Harry Yung, Egg Shen, Ho Chong, Birack, Chen Pao Shen, Wah Gey, Ho, Walter Chang, Old Chong, Mr. Wong, Grandpa Mori, and Janitor? If so, please report to the set of 3 Ninjas: Just For Kicks, because you are Victor Wong.
5. At some point, say 1983 or '84, Pat Morita could likely have turned out to be Victor Wong. But he didn't. Why? It's hard to say.